Callie has not had any more accidents. Having a newspaper covered litter pan seems to be working out for her. However she can't "cover" her mess with newspaper so her paws continue to get dirty and need to be cleaned.
She spent the majority of the day on the couch, in one spot. She would change position but stayed in that same spot for over four hours. Besides a brief sniff of my dinner there is not much life being exerted out of her. She spends most of her time staring off into space. Her breathing is shallow and faster paced. Her quality of life is very low.
She's still eating but it's very small. Since she hasn't been following us like she used to she's not following us into the kitchen to eat. In fact I don't think she's been upstairs in a couple of days. The second floor of my home is where my computer is, she usually joins me when I am here. She hasn't been.
Everyone keeps telling me that we'll know when it's time. We keep wondering if this is it but we are not sure. I keep hoping she'll make the decision for us. She still eats, she still fights us when we give her medication, she hates having her paws cleaned. But is she really here with us? She's barely interacting. She went from a young, playful, kitten, to a geriatric cat.
It will be better for us once she's gone. We can do heavy cleaning to remove all the urine stains and any traces on the coronavirus. We can go out on evenings or weekends and not be worried sick about our sick cat. We can think about adopting again, hopefully with better longevity. But what is best for her? I am stuck on the same issue again and again: I can't end her life without knowing it's what she wants. I can't have her die because it's convenient to me. But I also can't have her live with fluid in her lungs, no energy to play, no energy due to not eating, due to the virus.
My next pet will be taught English. Just enough to aide us with these awful end-of-life decision.
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